Dancing in the dark
Featured in the Listening Skills training manual
By Jessica Madge
Category: Communication Skills
Credit price: 3 download credits (Single user)
One of the ways in which we can gain rapport with another person is to adjust our pace to theirs. Some people prefer a rapid pace, and others are more comfortable taking things slowly. In work contexts we need to be award of this if we are to have successful conversations. If we do not keep up with fast paced people or if we rush ahead of slower paced ones, we will fail to gain their confidence and cooperation. This skill can be used in both face-to-face and telephone conversations. When talking on the telephone we lack the opportunity to match the posture and gesture of the other person, so we are ‘dancing in the dark’. Therefore, we have to rely more heavily on methods of building rapport, such as matching pace. This training activity along with ‘Are you on my wavelength?’ are thus of special value to those who work through the medium of the telephone. But whether we are face-to-face or on the telephone, this important method of building rapport is an essential part of our repertoire in all situations where we seek a positive business outcome.
This training activity begins with the participants working in groups of four, using observation and questionnaires to establish whether they are slow, medium or fast paced talkers. They then work in pairs to hold imaginary meetings in which they experience a mismatching and then a matching of pace, in order to heighten their awareness of the use of pace in business conversations.
Who is it for: This training activity is intended for use by trainers with participants to examine the powerful rapport-building effect of matching the talker’s pace, even when you cannot see each other.
- Themes:
- Advanced listening skills,
- Dealing with complaints and aggression,
- Fault diagnosis,
- Management and supervision,
- Interviewing,
- Appraisals,
- Absence,
- Performance management,
- Client handling,
- Selling,
- Negotiating,
- Influencing,
- Assertiveness,
- Emotional Intelligence,
- Counselling,
- Mediation,
- Meetings,
- On the telephone,
- Body language,
| Resource Type: | Activity |
| Min Group Size: | 4 |
| Max Group Size: | 20 |
| Typical Duration: | 02:00:00 |
| No of Pages: | 11 |
Resources: View standard resources for Fenman training activities
Additional resources: Holiday brochures (at least one for every two participants), Sticky labels (one per participant), Clipboards for participants (optional).
Purpose: This training activity is intended for use by trainers with participants who have some basic skills and are ready to build on them. It is assumed that participants have some knowledge of non-verbal behaviour and the concept of rapport. Pacing is important for people who deal with customer, clients and colleagues. Therefore, customer service, influencing, negotiating, client handling and aspects of one-to-one management are all relevant areas. It is particularly relevant to telephone conversations, during which it is impossible to match posture and gesture to build rapport.
Download the training activity, Dancing in the dark as featured in the Fenman training manual; Listening Skills