Don't get hooked
Featured in the Listening Skills training manual
By Jessica Madge
Category: Communication Skills
Credit price: 4 download credits (Single user)
This training activity concentrates on a thinking skill that can help us to become more effective listeners in stressful situations. It is based on the ideas originally developed by Eric Berne and known as transactional analysis. When listeners are dealing with ‘difficult people’ they can sometimes find it hard to keep thinking, rather than getting drawn into responding emotionally. The talker’s emotional state hooks a corresponding emotional state in the listener. Whether the ‘difficult person’ is a customer, a client, or a colleague, it is important to avoid these hooks if we are to maintain control of ourselves and rise to the challenge of managing the conversation successfully. A knowledge of transactional analysis can strengthen the listener’s ability to keep thinking, so that they can continue to choose the most effective way to respond so as to resolve heated situations more quickly.
You begin this training activity by explaining the basic parent-adult-child model of transactional analysis. Participants then complete a paper-and-pencil exercise to check their understanding. You then explain the elaborated model which divides the parent and child into two aspects, and refer back to the exercise to distinguish between the two. Next, there is an exercise involving placing cards on a model to reinforce understanding of the different states. In order to apply this information to difficult listening situations, there is an exercise which involves identifying the ego-state demonstrated in some examples and acting out some possible responses.
Who is it for: This training activity is intended for use by trainers to increase the self-awareness of listeners so that they will be better able to handle difficult conversations without becoming judgemental or intimidated.
| Resource Type: | Activity |
| Min Group Size: | 4 |
| Max Group Size: | 20 |
| Typical Duration: | 03:10:00 |
| No of Pages: | 28 |
Resources: View standard resources for Fenman training activities
Additional resources: Postcards, Masking tape, Three large plastic hula hoops, Clipboards for participants (optional).
Purpose: The theory of parent, adult and child can be used with all levels of staff. This training activity can be applied to any area where people might perceive that they are having to deal with ‘difficult people’. Customer complaints is an obvious area. Other areas are negotiation, mediation, dealing with disciplinary issues and staff counselling.
Download the training activity, Don't get hooked as featured in the Fenman training manual; Listening Skills