Making requests
Featured in the The Assertiveness Skills Pack training manual
By Joanna Gutmann
Category: Communication Skills
Credit price: 2 download credits (Single user)
Many people believe they are asking, when in fact they are making a statement. For example, ‘I am really getting behind with this report, I hate doing these figures and am never going to make the deadline’, when what they want to say is, ‘Please could you help me with this report by checking these figures?’ When the former statement is ignored or receives only sympathy, they feel slighted and may waste precious time, resenting the fact that no help was offered. By asking clearly and directly for what is wanted, there is a much greater chance of getting it. The problem is that being direct may feel blunt and rude. It is therefore necessary to show that, although it may feel harsh, it is actually more helpful to the other party, because they are clear about what is being asked, and can thus respond honestly. It is important that participants do not go too far and behave aggressively. The emphasis should be on considering an individual’s needs in comparison with the needs of other parties. The training resource should focus on aspects of non-assertive and aggressive styles in addition to moving towards an assertive one.
You enable participants to identify how they affect the way that others respond to their requests. Participants then experiment with, and practise, the skill of requesting assertively.
Who is it for: This training resource is intended for use by trainers to enable participants to identify how they affect the way that others respond to their requests, and provides them with the opportunity to experiment with, and practise, the skill of requesting assertively
- Themes:
- Assertive behaviour,
- Making requests,
- Responsibilities,
- Rights.,
| Resource Type: | Activity |
| Min Group Size: | 4 |
| Max Group Size: | 12 |
| Typical Duration: | 01:00:00 |
| No of Pages: | 9 |
Resources: View standard resources for Fenman training activities
Purpose: This training resource is intended for use by trainers with all staff who wish to increase their assertiveness skills. The training activity can be used alone, or can be combined with ‘Refusing requests’. If this is done, it is generally preferable to work with making requests, before practising refusing. All participants should have completed, ‘Rights in assertiveness’, and must have taken part in, ‘Behaviour styles’, or have undergone basic assertiveness training, to provide them with the background information and understanding to support this activity.
Download the training activity, Making requests as featured in the Fenman training manual; The Assertiveness Skills Pack